Evolotion of Species
Recently my brother explained child rearing in my family as an evolutionary process.
"It started with Grandma and Grandpa in the Philippines. Their main goal was to provide food and shelter. The basic necessities is all they could offer. And because of the harsh conditions, they couldn't be bothered with anything else. Then with our parents, food and shelter was not really an issue. So they turned their attentions to trying to provide material things beyond just the basic necessities, like clothes and stuff like that. Now with our generation, we are taking the next step. Like with Lily--I try to spend time playing with her and reading to her. Mom and Dad didn't read to us growing up."
I had never really thought about it like that before. So what does that say about where I am in this evolutionary process? From farmer, to factory worker, to office worker? And then every once in a while, somebody makes an evolutionary "leap" of sorts? Like the first fish that hopped out of the ocean and sprouted legs?!? Does being the first person in my family to go to college count for a "leap"?
So then what if your dad is CFO? Where to go from there? I spent sometime on Saturday with a group of friends from school. All of their moms are teachers who did read to them when they were young. Among their dads there is a CFO, a federal judge, a pilot, a successful business owner, and a college vice president. My friends? A foundation director, a waitress, a consultant, a radiology tech, a web designer, and an interior design student. Their life experiences include an advanced degree, life overseas, trips around the world (Africa, Asia, Fiji, Australia, Europe), a high rise condo in Seattle, a home on 2 acres in a gated community, a couple of high end European cars, and a few nice pieces of jewelry. I wonder, does it help to have a little bit of a "head start" of sorts? It has been debated by many, especially in the context of SAT scores. But seriously, I often wonder where I would be if my mom had read to me every night, or if I had no student loans, or if I had spent summers backpacking through Europe on mom and dad's dime, or....The list goes on.
Or how about those who are born into wealth? What opportunities are provided by such privelege and leisure? The best schools, the best clothes, access to exclusive getaways. Would my life be any better? Any more fulfilled? What of the evolutionary process there? I could go on, but for fear of spending any more time on the topic, and also of getting way too deep, I will end it here. Very thought provoking indeed.
posted by Rocky @ 8:42 AM
2 Comments:
I like the idea that child rearing aka Parenting, is an evolutionary process.... That means there's hope for my family yet! Generational improvements vs. what we so often see with the cycles that repeat themselves, especially in the areas of abuse, and neglect. The generational curse as my grandfather would call it...
I think even at the highest levels of wealthy families this is still possible... it's just manifest in different ways... not all sucess is measured tangibly, or financially. Acts of good will, integrity, and kindness are all areas that we can improve from generation to generation as well...
Nice post, very thought provoking...
I think we are all a product of our environment and genetics. Nature and Nurture produce us, together, but in what distribution I am not sure. But I know that most of us are ready to critique our parents, few of us understand or know our parents and their history, and most of us vow to be different. The thing I think we forget is that we are a product of generations. So in some ways, things that happened to our ancestors can affect the shape of our lives. Life is about balance. So being born into wealth, with good parents and values...I suspect challenges will surface in other ways. Sometimes our life path has obvious challenges, sometimes not so obvious. All I know is I kind of doubt Paris Hilton is more entitled to the good life than any of us. Life is what you make of it, and yourself, as best you can with the hand you were dealt. Fate....not too sure I am a full Buddhist or Hindu, that I am being rewarded or punished for something in a past life. I just think we are given the game to master, and we are given the skills to survive...we just have to dig deep for the endurance and choice to do it.
I never want to be comfortable as a victim. I want to keep moving towards a life that I steer.
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